The original judicial superhero

Justice AHM Shamsuddin Chowdhury Manik has been in the news lately.  Now, we stand by our prediction that he will soon become a judicial superhero in the struggle against the evil forces of BNP-Jamaat-imperialists-jihadis-gamchhawallahs and their agents in Bangla blogs.

But it would be gross distortion of history if we claim that Judge Manik is the original judicial superhero.  Alal and Dulal are ready to face contempt of court charge, but we must defend the correct history.  We must recognise the true father of judicial superheroes.

And no, we are not talking about this guy.

Oh no.  That’s imperialistic rubbish.  No sisters and brothers, we don’t mean that fictional stuff.  In Bangladesh, we have had a judicial superhero who was far, far more powerful than anything Americans could ever imagine.

In Bangladesh, the original judicial superhero was Chief Justice Khairul Haque.  He is the one who saved Bangladesh from all the evil Bangla’r Cromwell committed all the way back to the Battle of Plassey.  It’s only the cowardice of the current government that his dreams of exhuming Ziaur Rahman’s body and hanging it, like they did with the British Zia, goes unfulfilled.  Why, His Lordship Judge Khairul could have contributed to the fight against inflation had he been given the chance considering the way he made the court more affordable.

Of course, Judge Khairul’s biggest contribution to Bangladesh has been the verdict that restores true parliamentary democracy.  Written details of his verdict on the 13th Amendment was submitted on 29 March, and the government hasn’t yet released it.

The judgment is reportedly 1200 page long.  Given his previous verdict went to the 16th and 17th centuries, we expect this magnum opus to give opinion on whether it was good idea for Adam and Eve to have a caretaker.

But the nation is being denied a chance to bask in the glory of this judicial hero because some lesser judges have the effrontery to dissent!  Khairul Haque was a wise and scholarly judge, and it’s not their fault that some lesser minds find it hard to fathom his wisdom.  But such lesser minds should not deprive the nation of the work of this gallant man.

We demand that the government releases the 1,200 pages of wisdom forthwith and without delay.  Any failure to do so will only mean that anti-liberation forces have infiltrated the highest echelon of the government, and the government will stand accused of high treason.

Joy Khairul!

——-

Okay, if the sarcasm wasn’t obvious and anyone thought Alal and Dulal are turning into Awami Bloggers’ League, let us entertain you with classic Dhallywood ditty.

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